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In the blink of an eye, a forgotten memory can resurface. “Where did that come from?” one may ask. When I glanced at my husband, while watching a movie, I observed tears.”What is wrong?” I asked. He usually doesn’t say anything for a minute, wipes his eyes, and then explains.
“That scene reminded me of my mom. There was an elderly man who lived down the road and we often invited him over for dinner.” I suddenly realized how he may be dealing with grief in different ways.
As my mother-in-law’s “heavenly birthday” drew closer, I thought about ways to remember her and help with his grieving process. Because of her cooking expertise, I decided to make her famous bran muffins and enjoy Beer Meatloaf for dinner.
Creating a memory meal is a way of helping with grief. As we ate the bran muffins for breakfast and then the meatloaf for dinner, I found myself smiling at the memories of how she would instruct others on the best way to make these recipes. Her bran muffin recipe found its way to a 4-H Fair Competition. Her intriguing beer meatloaf recipe caused others to request it for their own meals.
A little later, texts from my husband’s siblings flooded his phone. ” I baked a cake and we drank Brandy Alexander’s in her honor, ” one communicated. ” I thought about the food, but we didn’t actually make anything,” another commented. Regardless, they thought about her and remembered her in some way.
As the holidays draw close, memories of loved ones can cause a deep sadness. Some may even avoid the holidays all together. A memory meal or including a favorite receipe may be the answer. Grief is a journey that never really ends.
