A crocus and peony buds peeking out from the landscape, the creek gurgling, and the sunshine warming our faces….. Could it really be that we are heading into better times?
Waterford announced that all restrictions have been lifted. No COVID tests are required and patients are allowed unlimited visits.
It almost seems too good to be true. After a year of the pandemic, the promise of freedom is a welcome relief. Praise God from whom all blessings flow.
Great news! Visitors, with a negative COVID-19 test, can visit Waterford patients again. We are grateful!
However, seeing these pictures, reminds me of how we never had the chance to actually create a room without clutter and with visual peace. Papers galore, not enough shelving for pictures– it’s time to get the drawing board out. I cannot wait!
More importantly, though, is getting together with my father. The time is coming. Thanks be to God!
Looking at these faces just makes me smile. It was a memorable Saturday afternoon visit complete with sunshine, piles of snow, laughter, and my father– out of Waterford, vaccinated, and with us.
When we first picked him up at Waterford, one of my first comments was, “Dad! Your hair!” Despite our meager attempts at hair gel borrowed from Gavin and combing with a wet brush, he still kept his Einstein look. My brother scheduled a hair appointment for Monday. But… it really didn’t matter because we were together.
During the afternoon visit, he slept off and on, but did perk up when talking to Mitch about agriculture, a topic he always enjoyed. He also asked questions on how church looks during a pandemic.
His hearing, always a challenge, meant that our conversations needed to be focused and deliberate or he would repeatedly say, ” My hearing is so bad.” The implant is not really working.
However, despite these minor challenges, we were together and that is what mattered. It was a beautiful day.
My mother always dreamed of visiting Ireland. She and my father almost went and then they changed their minds because of the excessive walking anticipated.
This song, though, says it all. We need a revival. We need spring. We need the pandemic to end.
However, I hope I am stronger and wiser despite the challenges. I hope that I can look back on the events and focus on the positive.
My mother deeply appreciated all types of music. In fact, she is the one who introduced me to polka! Who would have thought that a Dutch woman could appreciate such a different type of music! She often played the oldies on Saturday morning during cleaning, loved ABBA, and often played John Denver. When we moved my parents out of their Cutlerville home, we forgot all about the vinyls up in the attic. I hope someone is enjoying them!
She also stressed the importance of my brother and I playing an instrument. Those Saturday morning piano lessons paid off in many ways. One of the best memories was several years ago at my uncle’s funeral service in Virginia. An intense snowstorm meant that the pianist could not play for his funeral. I was able to play instead.
When I listen to this song by Andrew Peterson, I cannot help by wonder what the music in heaven must be like. Is it one continual litany of praise? Is my mother singing?
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
BY ROBERT FROST
Robert Frost, a poet my mother often quoted, came to mind today as I meandered in our woods, stopping to marvel at the white intricate snow patterns dotting the landscape.
Snow reminds me not only of my mother but also how a fresh outlook can change perspective. It can revitalize, energize, and allow a chance to slow down and marvel at the beauty of our world.
Valentine’s Day memories include a variety of events. Sometimes, I would take pictures of the kids and send to grandparents. Most included classroom parties. One of my favorite activities was melting crayons in the shape of a heart and passing it out to the students.
My father didn’t really care about the day, but my mom did. She was angry one year that I didn’t send her a Valentine. I found it interesting since the Dutch don’t really celebrate it. Why did she deem it so important?
Perhaps it is because it reminds us to care. It’s not only a day to remember for our spouses and significant others but also to reach out during the winter to say hello.
Last year at this time, I attended my uncle’s funeral.
It was a good funeral, but how can you call a funeral good? It was the spiritual legacy he left behind with his family and friends. It was a fitting day to have a funeral.
Valentine’s Day is a way to remember fun memories but also the greatest love of all- Jesus Christ. Happy Valentine’s Day, 2021.
As I scrolled through last year’s pictures, I came across the sunroom at Royal Park. Always one of my favorite places, I often spent time with my father here. It seemed to remind him of his Cutlerville home as my parents often sat in the sunporch on Sunday afternoons.
Another memory- checkers. On this particular day, my dad was grumpy and did not want to play.
When my father’s text, HI MICHELLE, came across the screen, I immediately responded. “Dad? Did you wake up? Dad?” No response.
Several attempts at communicating with the staff to receive an update remained futile. “We will call you back,” they told me when I phoned repeatedly. I realize that a nursing home facility is busy, but how does one connect? How does one connect with your father when he doesn’t communicate and you cannot visit the building?
My mind goes back to my mom’s communication skills. There was a point when she also stopped communicating. This is different, though, because I was able to see her.
My brother thinks there is no update and calls it zombie sleeping. But what does that mean?
Later in the afternoon, I received word that the next step may be dialysis. I will need to research to better understand. His kidneys are not doing well. I also learned that his speech is sometimes unintelligible.
I also received a Facetime call, but he was asleep during all of it.
While I wait, I will keep looking at pictures- pictures of last year when I was able to be there. Those visits weren’t always glorious or fulfilling, but that was okay. It was all part of the journey, a journey worth traveling, a journey I will always remember.
The words cut like a knife- failure to thrive. As I listened to the ZOOM conference describing my father’s condition, it was difficult to utter a word. I was thankful that I was in my office where the busyness of school surrounded. Everything they described seemed hauntingly familiar to my mother’s last moments: weight loss, increase in sleeping, and then the main thing- a change in his speech. ” He isn’t really talking.”
My brother spoke most of the time and kept advocating for the medical staff to explore all options. It was just with my mom. He advocated, I agreed, but inwardly felt that things were changing.
And then the document came in my inbox with a yes or no by each. It was a necessary step to outline the end of life measures.
1. Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR).
2. Artificial means of nutrition (i.e., feeding tube).
Artificial nutrition/hydration may be given through a nose
or stomach tube.
3. Artificial means of hydration (temporary).
IV Therapy may provide hydration via a tube in the vein.
4. Placement on a ventilator.
A ventilator is a machine that provides artificial breathing.
5. Organ Donation
6. Antibiotics for infection.
7. Autopsy.
8. Transfer to hospital in an emergency situation or in the event
of a serious medical illness.
It’s hard to capture the feelings. I want him to get that second vaccine so badly, but will it make a difference? Will he overcome the failure to thrive?
