June Visit

Thinking back to the spring/summer of 2019 brings back a host of memories. Searching for a Michigan home to purchase, then deciding to rent, and finally ending up right near my former childhood home was only part of the adventure. When my mother fell and broke her femur, our lives instantly changed to a schedule of doctor’s visits, hospital stays, and then the funeral. Amidst all of that was my father in denial that she passed.

When I look at him now and hear him say that he doesn’t remember any of it, I can hardly believe it. How can he forget the crazy night in the hospital? How can he forget the funeral? He even says he forgets my mother at times. I pretend I don’t hear those words.

Fast forward to this past week when I drove to Michigan to see him and attend the medical case conference with my brother.

“He’s been sleeping way more”, the aide stated. ” He even was sleeping in the pool”.

We laughed at that statement. How can anyone actually sleep in the pool? We believed them, but it seemed incredulous.

The conference, somewhat similar to educational case conferences, outlined his cognitive, physical, and emotional condition. The recreational therapist shared how he was asked what activity would fill him with the most joy. His answer? Horseback riding. They are searching for a local horse stable to make it happen. ” I better get a notice when that happens,” my brother remarked, chuckling. They assured us and shared how horseback riding takes place with a variety of people, including the elderly.

Taking a different turn, they reviewed his medications and decided that a different anti-depressant could help his mood improve. His constant sleep could indicate that his body is shutting down, though. They were willing to try a different medication but acknowledged that it may or may not work. My brother pointed out that hospice, the next step, was suggested two years ago as well. I appreciated his optimism but remembered how excessive sleepiness could be attributed to the end of life.

After the conference, we brought him outside to encourage him. As always, the topic turned to his sleepiness. ” I am so tired, ” he muttered. ” Hey, Dad! What about writing a poem for your great-granddaughter? In one month, she will be born!”

He perked up and agreed that it would be a good idea. Time will tell if he actually writes it. The journey continues….