“Caregiving 101”

If Caregiving 101 was an actual class offered, many would agree that it’s one we often repeat throughout the course of our lives. Taking care of young children, sometimes the first experience, can be daunting at times. Taking care of young children is a definite sacrifice as sleep patterns change, a clean house changes into a toy-cluttered one, and social activities revolve around a child’s nap patterns. Conversations with others, usually short and disjointed, sometimes never resumes. The question”What were we talking about again?” may repeat on a daily basis. Driving children to a variety of activities is a different type of caregiving as the young child develops into a middle schooler. When your child, a newly licensed driver, drives off with your vehicle, sacrifice occurs again as you change your schedule and hope for safe return.

The experience of a broken bone or surgery quickly causes one to learn how to be a caregiver. When Corey broke his arm while riding a tandem bike, taking care of his needs became paramount during a hot summer. Keeping him comfortable, helping him elevate his arm, and other tasks kept me busy, but it was temporary. Chloe, while a high school senior, tore her ACL and miniscus while playing soccer. She needed help during and after the surgery, although her story may differ because of her strong independent personality!

Now– caregiving is at a different level with parents. How do you step into this role as a child to an aging parent? How do you assert yourself when the person is older and wiser in so many ways?

When I overruled my father’s wishes to stay overnight in the hospital without me, it took persistence. “Why not? he questioned. ” I want to do this for her!” Thankfully, he ended up agreeing, but not all decisions will go as well.

Another part to caregiving is sacrificing your own desires for those who need care. In a recent conversation with a friend, she remarked on the non- existence of vacation this summer due to the medical needs of aging family members. On the flip side, I canceled an upcoming colonoscopy due to the busyness of driving to Michigan and preparing for a Michigan move. Trust me– no tears on that decision!

My first assignment, coming up next Wednesday, is to help my mom at her first post- surgery appointment. Remembering her appointment as well as completing the myriad of tasks when moving is no small undertaking! Navigating the Michigan roadways, easy for those who live there but something I need to review, is another part of this adventure.

Despite all of these thoughts and feelings, 1 Timothy 5:8 reminds me of the importance of taking care of our loved ones. “If anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” Taking care of aging parents, while not easy, is a task God values. Knowing that God orchestrated this entire journey provides a deep peace.